Goodbye Anuj Radheshyam

He reassured me that everything is ready while leaving. Don't you worry. You send the material in the press. Books will be out in two days. I couldn't believe how this would turn out? His body was calm in the journey just before reaching Bhopal leaving Mumbai. While leaving, I told you not to worry, the booklets will be ready. And literally two days after she left her associate printer handed me both booklets I wanted......

My respected father Shri Gopiramji's elder brother i.e. my uncle Shri Dwarkadasji's age was increasing and his body was also becoming unwell. They didn't have any sons. Seven daughters were born one after another in life. The father was worried about him how his descendant would run if he didn't have a single son?

Due to this concern, he had adopted his first son Balkrishna to his other elder brother Shri Rameshwarji, because he had no children. No son, no daughter. He had unlimited respect for the elder brothers. To free my elder brother Dwarkadasji from this sorrow he decided to adopt me.

This was the year of 1937 and I was thirteen then. It's easy to adopt an infant away from its birth and birth mother but at the age of thirteen it was just unbearable to imagine. My elder brother Babulal was one and a half years older than me but we always lived together like twin brothers.

My birth mother, who was always overflowing with love, had a great attachment with me and her. Even at that young age I used to get unbearable migraine attacks once or twice a year. She used to be so sad because of this.

In such a situation she would lay me down and put my head on her lap and sometimes pat me with fresh butter, sometimes with almond oil. This loving pat of her used to bring amazing results. Shortly after, my head started tingling that spreads all over the body.

It was a kind of rehearsal of the upcoming Vipassana, which was felt by my mother's affectionate touch. This doesn't make me feel the pain and I would have slept with my head on my mother's lap. The tearful face of the loving mother blossoms. I find it unbearable to talk about being away from such a mother.

One day my father taught me his responsibility to free his elder brother from sorrow. Uncle was much older than father. They loved daddy so much. Were of business and where ever difficulty came they solved it themselves. He was happy by giving them light tasks while teaching them tricks.

All the difficult business works - like going to Uttar Pradesh for weeks and selling clothes etc. used to do by themselves. Now they need a son. They will be glad to have you. And we all live and live together in the same house. Are you not going away from us.

I couldn't resist listening to his speech, mesmerized by his infinite devotion and favor for my elder brother. And then I used to see that my uncle is like a goddess, a person of unattainable nature and Tai Maa is like a living statue of a goddess, who is always calm.

I've never heard him say anything loud in my whole life even after going ahead. I understood this thing of my father that he stays with me. Brother, don't go anywhere far like Balkrishna. So I accepted dad's decision.

About one-and-a-half years after the adoption incident, Tai Maa gave birth to Radheshyam. This filled my heart with joy. Along with that, a machalan also woke up and I went to my father and urged him that he has got a son to run his uncle's dynasty.

Now take me back. I'm not sad there but being away from my mother is unbearable for me. Dad got a little tough this time. He said-You see, how unwell uncle is. Don't know when their body will calm down. (And literally almost a year later his body calmed down. )

Now you have to take special responsibility. Have to take care of my uncle's family, have to serve him. Don't run away from your responsibility. The responsibility I have given you has been thoughtful. It is your duty to fulfill it.

Ramcharit Manas had a profound influence on me since childhood. While leaving my parents and going to exile, remembering Ram again and again, my mind used to be filled with the ideal feelings of paternal devotion. Leaving the whole Rajpat and living in the forest was not a simple thing. But father's command then father's command.

Rajivalochan Ram is going, I can't divide you. ...

I used to get confused while singing this post. Today my father has commanded me to serve his elder brother's family. Now that's my privilege. I obeyed him. Never felt like going back to my loving mother's lap after this.

After completing matriculation in 1940 I got into work and had to leave Burma due to the two years of Japanese war. Had to live a very difficult life after coming to India, because a lot of wealth was left in Burma. Where on one side he was in search of work and business, on the other hand, Radheshyam was studied with the care of Tai Maa and her family.

He was skilled in studying, so he went ahead with ease. When he settled in the south for doing business, his studies continued there too. Again returned to Burma after the Japanese war, then his studies continued there too. She wanted to be an engineer. I was sad that I didn't get the opportunity to study in college even after scoring highest marks in Burma in matriculation exam and getting scholarship from the government.

So I have decided that there will be no ban on the study of Radheshyam. Read as much as you want. After some time, he did engineering from Birla College of Pilani and came to Burma and had to leave Burma and go to India once again in business, he was bonding with family in business.

I came to India with the responsibility of teaching Vipassana in the year 1969 after taking the blessings of Gurudev in Burma. Camps were also starting to start. But I was worried about how I will be able to fulfill this responsibility? Meanwhile, while conducting Bodhgaya camp, this information was received that the most respected Gurudev gave up his body. Then I did a ten day self camp and then decided that now I have to spend the rest of my life in Vipassana, free from all the responsibilities of business, family etc.

I wrote this resolution of mine to my brothers. Others keenly had encouraging answers, but Radheshyam and younger brother Gaurishankar ran to Bodhgaya - to assure me that I shouldn't worry about business and family. Let me keep on doing my good work. I'm definitely engaging in my religious work.

But there was full support of dear Radheshyam in this work too. He continued to support as much as possible in every field of Vipassana while performing his work-business responsibilities. His greatest support that I will always remember and will be remembered by all Vipashyi Sadhaks, was that he fulfilled one of my strongest wishes.

Just as India's lost Vipassana Vidya returns from Burma and flourishes here, so may Lord Buddha's original speech be published in India and more and more people benefit from it. 'Vipassana Vishodhan Vinyasa' was formed for this work and Radheshyam took the responsibility of its operations.

This task caused a difficulty. All the literature of Tipitak was not able to be printed and published even after it was ready. Those who took this job, all failed. At last Radheshyam took responsibility for this work and got all the literature of Tipitak printed beautifully and published it in the form of very beautiful books. This is his great gift for India.

He also took the responsibility of preparing CD-ROM of all Tipitak and all the related poly literature and performed it well. Create such programs in CD-ROM, which can make publication work in seven scripts of Asia and if desired, different CD-ROMs can be prepared. Such a search program was created which can complete many types of research work in all Tipitak.

Another great job done by those who used to get ready for publishing books related to Vipassana, responsibly kept printing and publishing them. In this way, by publishing the abundant literature of Vipassana, he earned great virtue. Lived with me in the house, so he followed my instructions completely in every work in the publication-field.

Just in the past days, there was a requirement that two books were to be printed and published within a week. I was writing booklets but couldn't finish it due to being unwell. How will it be published on time? Radheshyam had taken the responsibility of printing and publishing these on his head. But as per the pre-fixed program he had to go to Bhopal. He reassured me that everything is ready as I left.

Don't you worry. You send the material in the press. Books will be out in two days. I couldn't believe how this would turn out? His body was calm in the journey just before reaching Bhopal leaving Mumbai. While leaving, I told you not to worry, the booklets will be ready. And literally two days after she left her co printer handed me both booklets I wanted.

Fulfilling his responsibility in the field of religion, he went on a great journey. All the services he provided in the field of religion will be a part of his future Bhavayatra. May he continue to move towards liberation - this is the wish of religion, good wishes, good wishes.

Kalyan friend,

Satya Narayan Goyanka

Published in Vipassana Magazine Collection 03, 2007

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